I’ve recently spent a lot of time out of my normal environment. It’s been challenging to balance all the balls including not taking my partner for granted.
When I take on a new challenge it consumes me and there is very little time for anything or anyone else. One thing that remains important is maintaining my relationship which isn’t always easy and with everything going on puts it at about 69 on the priority list.
One thing that does work is making time to chat every day. Not just about what happened in our day but sharing how much I thought about him and miss him. By the time the weekend comes along, when we’ll physically see each other, the foundation for intimacy has been nurtured.
But what about a little fun, so I dug out a firm favourite. It’s always a good back up but as with everything in a relationship – timing is everything and you need to sound authentic.
Let’s learn how to talk dirty. At Lola Montez, we’ll tell you that there are 7 tops tips to use when talking dirty. You do know I’m not talking about laundry, right?
7 Top tips on HOW TO TALK DIRTY.
Top Tip 1 – You think it’s not for you, but it can be!
It’s empowering and fun.
You know you want to; you know it turns you on, you know that one dirty word that makes him want to explode! Only you can’t say the words! You’re not that kind of person!
Learning to talk dirty is empowering, sexy and fun but it takes practice, and the best thing is that you do not have to use one filthy word to do it. Innuendo goes a very long way.
Top Tip 2 – Types of dirty talk.
There are three ways in which to talk dirty –
- Encouragement: – ‘Oh my you are such a big boy! You’re such a dirty girl!’
- Erotic Instruction: – ‘Deeper, take me deeper! Ride me baby – ride me!’
- Fantasies: –‘Your library books are late, you will have to pay a fine!”
Find the one that suites you on the day. We all know that not everything works every day, everywhere, all of the time!
Top Tip 3 – Start with what turns you on.
The best place to start is to think about what it is that turns you on – do you like to watch? Always wanted to be the wonton librarian. Well, that’s a place to start.
Now you have to find your voice. You have to say the words aloud.
Top Tip 4 – Learning to say the words.
Start alone, it gives you a chance to laugh at yourself. You can practice changing the inflections in your voice until it works.
You need to get used to saying them so when you whip them out in a moment of passion – your partner is not the only one who is shocked!
Words to practice on your own:
- Do you want me?
- I want you.
- Do you like this?
- Oh, I love it when you …
- Harder!
- Big! – Mrs Big DOES NOT work!
Top Tip 5 – What turns your partner on?
Try to establish what turns your partner on.
Sex in a public place, you can try: ‘What if someone sees us?’ – Always had a thing for a teacher – ‘You’ve been so bad! I am going to have to spank you!’
Work on scenarios and speaking them.
Top Tip 6 – Get ideas from the experts.
If your imagination is having trouble- read a naughty book or article, watch a porn movie.
Call a cam line, expensive but all in the name of research! See which words or scenarios work for you.
This may seem really embarrassing at first but when it is said in the throws of passion it is an instant way to heat up the situation.
Top Tip 7 – What NOT to say.
A word to the wise – do not ever mention friends, family members, neighbours or the dog.
Why not is a whole different discussion!